Face to Facebook

I'm 'bout to do something cray and give up Facebook.

As it stands I can only make this promise to myself for a week and then I'll have to see if I am still a person after seven whole days of no one 'liking' my photos or posts. Tomorrow begins the first of my seven 24-hour periods where I don't spray my verbal diarrhea in the bar that innocently asks 'What's on your mind?'

I've been thinking about this since I returned from Sri Lanka. Whilst away, my life became increasingly virtual. My interactions and my thoughts were shared through the medium of Instagram and Facebook and it felt normal. Now that I'm back in the land of free time and beer, I'm worried that I have nothing to say, or at least that I've forgotten how to say it. Am I capable of more than one thought at a time? Am I able to respond authentically to your words without a little blue thumb? Because that's just it. I feel that my dealings with other people are becoming less and less intimate and authentic. Yuck.

I'll still be writing. I hope that this exercise will improve my writing, because right now what I'm writing in my tiny text box is making me sad. I don't want to engage in a conversation about Ferguson or Israel on Facebook. I'm not interested in reading inspirational quotes that tell me how to live or how not to, as is usually the case. I don't want to be bombarded with images of people dumping buckets of ice on their heads or videos that play without my permission and without sound that me make me panic momentarily that I've gone deaf. I fucking hate that.

It's not that I don't want to talk to you. I do. Very much. But I want it to be a conversation. A conversation that not everyone can see or weigh in on. A conversation that doesn't creepily produce ads that are linked to our conversation. I'm curious to see how many of you will talk to me. How many will email me and start an actual correspondence that may result in me hearing your voice or seeing you. Facebook has made me so lazy. Why get on the train and meet for a coffee when we can catch up through our screens? Why go to the cinema together when we can each download the same film, watch it and then exchange notes via status updates? Why have dinner when it's easier to eat mindlessly in front of the TV and then get back on the internet.

I've justified for years that I needed Facebook because I'm so damn international, but I don't. It's a convenient excuse and maybe I'm just afraid that if I don't log on I'll be lonely. But I'm kinda lonely right now. I'm in a city with my best friends and a bazillion great things to do and I'm sat on my ass reading about the lives of people who I don't matter to.

I think what I worry about the most is that I won't see enough cat videos each day. How the hell am I going to cope with that? If you care to help me detox you can email me on kandykorn143@yahoo.co.uk or subscribe to my blog. I'll be posting here about my progress, and my failings. I look forward to our conversation. 

You've got your Zion Me...

Today I read a story about how a 90-year-old Jewish woman in Belgium was denied medical treatment due to her religion. The doctor refused to see her and instructed her to ‘Go to Gaza to be treated.’ In Belgium… That’s a fucking long way to travel, Doctor Douche. This highly educated imbecile later acknowledged his outburst and blamed it on an ‘emotional reaction’ he was having to the current Israel/Palestine conflict. Correct me if I’m wrong, but as the doctor actually instructed the woman to travel to Gaza he must have known that geographically she had not a damned thing to do with the current climate in the Middle East. Nothing to do with firing bullets or launching rockets…this man knew this logically, but he couldn’t understand it emotionally. This is a problem.

Earlier last week I wrote about how I was offended that the majority of news sources who were supporting Israel’s right to defend itself (as I do) were falling back on the lame argument that because the same people who are protesting against Israel may or may not have protested against other humanitarian atrocities like Darfur and Syria they were Anti-Semites. I call bullshit. There are better arguments than that, more accurate than that, and a journalist accusing those demonstrating against the humanitarian crisis in Israel of being Anti-Semitic is ludicrous. But people demonstrating against Jews is a different story.

Fact. I am a Jew. Fact. I am not an Israeli, nor do I live in Israel. Not all Israelis are Jews, not all Jews are Israelis. This is a truth that cannot be denied. I am linked to Israel by religion, but so are Christians, Catholics and Muslims. Fact. I do not support the Israeli occupation of Palestine. 2005 blah, blah, blah anywhere else in the world we would see this as colonialism and occupation. It doesn’t make it right just because they keep trying to kill each other. It doesn’t make it right just because it’s in a part of the world that few have visited and even fewer understand. I don’t get it either. Not a clue.

I can be Jewish and I can be pro a two state solution. I can be a Jew and want you to stop killing people. These two things are not mutually exclusive. So if you refuse to treat me at your hospital because you watched the news last night and were unhappy with a terrible situation in a whole other country which is neither sanctioned nor approved by me, then yes, you Dr. Douchebag have become an Anti-Semite. If you put a sign on the door of your cafe that says ‘Dogs allowed, Jews are not’, you, bastardo are an Anti-Semite. The Israel/Palestine conflict did not create this poison. For the people doing these things so close to home, that poison that has always been there; fermenting, rotting and now it’s starting to seep out. And now I can smell it.   

When a B&B in the UK refused to let a gay couple stay the night at their establishment, like any good Brit I wrote a strongly worded letter. I got pissed off and I wondered who the hell raised those people? Those hateful, miserable assholes? I stood in solidarity with my friends and agreed that that is not how you treat people. I signed a petition to boycott their establishment and I posted my disgust on Facebook. As per usual, I never left anyone doubting exactly how I felt about that situation. When Russia was/is hunting gays in the streets I protested, I fumed, I posted articles and raised awareness. I boycotted products from China for three years until South Sudan became independent and China stopped sending weapons to fund the genocide there. And no one is looking for a pat on the back...However, today I saw the post about the Belgian doctor on Facebook three times. All posted by Jewish friends all with comments made by their Jewish friends. It’s starting to feel a bit lonely out here, guys.

You can hate violence and policy and war without hating me. Do I think that anyone who opposes the war is Anti-Semitic? No I certainly do not. Do I think that anyone who does not speak up and oppose Anti-Semitism is an Anti-Semite? No. But it does hurt. Many of you whose voices boom for peace and cry out for a stop to the war are very quiet when in your own backyard I possibly wouldn’t be seen by a doctor or would have my place of worship burned to the ground, not for fighting and killing children, but just for existing. Just for having Jewish parents and having had a Bat-Mitzvah. I would stand with you. I have stood with you.

I am not this conflict. Neither are you. We are so much more than that and if we lose sight of this then I’m afraid we’re all doomed.